Tag: depression

Lipstick, Fitness, and Things Like Horror Movies

“I hope they’ll know how hard I tried to live in love, to love in depth, let wonder take away my breath, to give until there’s nothing more, this is what I want to be remembered for. Everything else you can set it on fire.” ~ Colony House

“I want your lips to be the first thing people see when they walk through that door!” my boss exclaimed while we young ladies were gathered around for a staff meeting. I’ll never forget that line or the fire in her voice as long as I live. Think Devil Wears Prada with the southern allure of Dolly Parton. At the time, I was in sales training at a high-end makeup and formal dress store for brides and beauty queens in a large micropolitan area just outside Brad Paisley’s southern comfort zone. I’d always loved makeup and dressing up, but the energetic owners of the store gave a new meaning to my previously held visions of a glam up. Plump, vibrant, impossible-to-resist lips were a requirement. Lips that could sell anything. I won’t deny the power of the right lipstick, but maybe I didn’t want my lips to be the talk of the town. In all FAIRness, I love a bold COLOURPOP. It just seemed VANITY to me regarding what my priority was supposed to be; not a genuine smile, but sales lips. I learned a lot during my time there. About fashion, cosmetics, and the not-so-glamorous side of sales. Life lessons that still resonate and fill me with gratitude many years later…

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The Wound, the Wind, and the Wizard

“All the variety, all the charm, all the beauty of life is made up of light and shadow.” ~ Leo Tolstoy

I find myself drawn to both light and darkness, and by this dichotomy I am often perplexed. I guess it explains my fascination with the idea of shadows. And the moon. In cryptic prose, I often reflect on the topic of pain. Maybe if I finally chronicle this story, I’ll be able to let the pain of the past go…

The wizard ~ I was peering through the lens of apprehension as my eye appointment neared the shore of reality. Perhaps I was less than optimistic because instead of one, it had been two years since my last visit. But eight tests, four cornea specialists, and two hours later, everything appears to be fine. My eyes are “quiet” as the wizard says. Unbeknownst to him, that’s how I refer to my eye doctor. A world-renowned surgeon. A miracle worker. A man who once told me in his dry sense of humor, “I don’t have a crystal ball,” when he couldn’t conjure up a vision of my future eye health for my peace of mind…

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